Sunday afternoons/evenings should be shared with friends and family. Sundays growing up were always the days where we slept in til lunch and then went out to my grandmother's to spend the afternoon with all my aunts and uncles and cousins. We played and caught up on the week and made plans as a family before sharing the evening meal. It was out together day. It was our way as a family to stay close and connected.

Today I miss that. My younger cousin had a bridal shower today, and all of the family was there for her except me. We two have never been close, but she's family. It's an important event, and I missed it. I talked to my grandmother on Friday during the day, and I realized that I hadn't talked to her in about a month. That never use to happen. Granddaddy's birthday is next week too. It will be the second birthday without him. I worry about her. She's there in the house by herself all the time except when one of the family stops by or she goes to the doctor's office or something like that. I can only imagine she must get lonely. I miss them all this weekend more than normal.

And I hate coming home alone on the weekends I spend in Des Moines. I know it won't be too much longer, but I still don't like it. It just seems paricularly awful to have to do this weekend. I like my alone time. I need it on a basic level every now and then or I'll go crazy. But it's so nice to have someone to come home to. Even if you aren'ty in the same room or doing the same thing, it's nice knowing someone is around. I'm even alone in the whole house today. The neighbors are gone. It's too quiet, and I ran out of things to do very quickly.

Just felt like whining for a moment, and now I'm done. Nothing I can do to change things at the moment, so no use in whining too much about it. It feels good though for just a moment.